Korncrake!
The Website of Herr Professor Doktor Boethius P. von Korncrake

Parts 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, & 6 I still don’t remember exactly how I made it back from the Tick-Tock to my tiny bunk in my shabby domitory room on the campus of Western Michigan University. The last event I can recall clearly is admirably holding up my end of a Karaoke duet of […]

Read: Von Korncrake in Kalamazoo, Part 7 »

Parts 1, 2, 3, 4, & 5 I spent two very satisfying hours trolling the publishers’ booths, eavesdropping on conversations and thumbing through tedious books on subjects in which I had no interest. And when those meagre entertainments were exhausted I decided it was time to see what the town of Kalamazoo offered. A few […]

Read: Von Korncrake in Kalamazoo, Part 6 »

Parts 1, 2, 3, & 4. Since the presentation of my opus, “Cultural Semiotics, Semi(n)ology and Semiotics: scientia omnis aut est de signis aut de rebus significatis: Text, Textuality and Semiosis”, would not take place until Saturday afternoon, I abandoned the second Friday afternoon session, a tedious discussion of Carolingian numismatics I had wrongly thought […]

Read: Von Korncrake in Kalamazoo, Part 5 »

The first part of this story may be found here, the second part here, and the third part here. Coffee in hand, I fled the cafeteria and found my way to the first session of the morning. I had selected it whimsically, based solely upon the fact that all three papers being presented had misused […]

Read: Von Korncrake in Kalamazoo, Part 4 »

I had promised to give you the fourth installment of von Korncrake in Kalamazoo, but unfortunately I was felled over the weekend by what was either a two-day version of the bubonic plague or a bad doner kebab. I am now somewhat better, and will post part four of von Korncrake in Kalamazoo later this […]

Read: My Apologies »

The first part of this story may be found here, and the second part here. On my first morning in America, I emerged into the Midwestern daylight and was immediately engulfed by the International Congress on Medieval Studies, like a German sunbather in a tsunami, swept up in a roiling mass of 5,000 screechingly insecure […]

Read: Von Korncrake in Kalamazoo, Part 3 »

The first part of this story may be found here. After a lengthy flight from Frankfurt to Michigan, with a change to a regional carrier in Detroit, I arrived in Kalamazoo jet-lagged and exhausted, but happy. I had with me three copies of my paper, one in my suitcase, the second in my briefcase, and […]

Read: Von Korncrake in Kalamazoo, Part 2 »

This afternoon, when I returned from a lengthy and sausage-intensive lunch, I found my chief assistants, Manfred and Helmut, atwitter. They had just received the improbably thick program of the 42nd Annual International Congress on Medieval Studies. “Herr Professor von Korncrake,” squeaked Helmut, brandishing the monstrosity in my face, “look, here is the session in […]

Read: I’ve Got a von Korncrake in Kalamazoo »

“Guten Morgen, Herr Prof. Dr. von Korncrake,” said my chief research assistants, Manfred and Helmut, as I entered the office this morning. “Guten Morgen, gentlemen,” i replied, removing my coat and hat and handing them to Helmut. “Have you seen the news, Herr Professor?” asked Manfred excitedly, “the Berlin wall was stolen this morning!” “Manfred, […]

Read: Berlin Wall Stolen? »

Last Tuesday afternoon, as I was trying to slip out four hours early, the director of our division, Herr Prof. Dr. Kleimann, ambushed me in the hallway. “Herr Prof. von Korncrake,” he asked, “I understand from your assistants that you are an afficionado of the comedic cinema?” “Yes, Herr Direktor,” I said, forcing a cheery […]

Read: Music and Lyrics »